Discovering more about myself

So I've been flicking through a few other 'slaves' blogs lately, and its interesting to know how other submissives write about how they feel and the things that they have done to them. It makes for an interesting perspective on my own position, and things I hope that come from my own training.

There are plenty of slaves out there that enjoy more than a little bit of pain, and it sorta made me realise just how much I fall into the same boat, like a lot more than I realised. For example, last night after I got home, I did a little tidying up, but the house wasn't spotless as it should have been, so when Mistress got home I was given a mildly severe attack with the whip. When Mistress comes at me with the whip though, she makes a game of trying to hit the exact same spots over and over, so if I get 20 hits, then usually that means two spots on my ass will get 10 hits each, so by the time that same spot gets a flogging over and over, I'm usually screaming into the pillow or mattress in pain, but afterwards I usually find myself with a big, hard, pulsing erection (that's when I'm not wearing my lock) and I find myself admiring the red marks on my ass in the mirror - I love it.

So that has pretty well confirmed it for me, I am much more of a masochist than I first thought. But its more than just the pain, its just being abused in general that I think does it for me. Again, reading some other posts from other submissives, hearing them talk about how their 'tops' push them around, pull their hair, slap them in the face so hard that hours later they still feel the sting and think about why they were punished. If it weren't for my lock I would be hard at the thought (so instead I try to get hard and the spikes push hard on the base of my cock, causing me more pain, which makes me want to get harder!).

In conclusion, I don't think there is really too much of a point to today's post, just wanted to share some thoughts with you. Hope you found them interesting!

Keeping up to standards

Today was a busy day at work, so I was kinda looking forward to a little relax time when I got home, but I knew that I wouldn't be able to do it, as I had let the house slip into a bit of a mess and it needed to be cleaned ... pretty badly actually. Mistress has been letting me get away with this actually, which kinda surprised me, but I knew that wouldn't last forever. So I got home, and I cleaned for a few hours, every room of the house, and I think it looks pretty good. I'll have to wait and see what Mistress says when she gets home.

Also on the topic of standards, I thought I might share the highlights of my slave contract with you. So here is sort of a summary in point form:

• I must wear a symbol of ownership at all times, being either a) my actual collar (when in private) or b) a public collar, which is in the form of a leather wrist band.
• It sets out a daily routine for me, detailing what I must do at various times of the day.
• It details guidelines on recreation time, expenditure, behavior in public and private as well as exclusions.
• It details daily training tasks that I should perform each day without being prompted. At the moment that includes a minimum of 10 minutes of having pumps hard on my nipples, as well as having a medium sized toy in my ass for a minimum of 10 mins (I usually manage 30 with the pumps and at least an hour with the butt plug - and that's usually because I try to find a bigger one after a while and see how I go with that! I like to please so I try to train my hardest)
• It specifies that I am only allowed to orgasm with permission of my Mistress, so if she says no, then that means no. Also I am required to wear my chastity lock at all times when I am not with Mistress (I plan on posting some photos of the lock this week sometime)
• It outlines how I am to be punished when I break the rules. We've chosen to make up a set of punishment cards, ranging from level 1 (for small breaks) to 5 (for massive breaks). Mistress will pick an appropriate card for each punishment as see shes fit.
• And last, but definitely not least, whatever Mistress says goes, no questions asked.

There are plenty of good resources on the net if your looking at putting a contract together, we found heaps of stuff and putting this together, so it was pretty easy.

Anyway that's enough from me for now, I really should go and finishing my cleaning so I don't cop another punishment (Mistress can be quite mean with the whip!)

Welcome to my world

Well here I go, entry number one in a new blog ... but I haven't exactly done a blog like this before. I've never really been the best writer in the world either, but this is something that I really wanted to do, and my Mistress wants me to as well, so here it is.

This blog is basically going to describe my life in my slavery to my Mistress. The first thing that I will point out about our relationship is that this is all consensual, I freely give myself to her, there is no abuse here. I wasn't exactly sure what to write about, or how to write it, or what I wanted to get out of this, but after floating around the net and finding some excellent blogs of other BDSM loving slaves, I sorta got a taste for it and decided to start writing.

So I'll start by describing the relationship I have with my Mistress. We have been together in a regular relationship for just over 16 months now. I love her and she means the world to me. We had often dipped into the world of BDSM play, we had both switched roles as Dominant and submissive, but we hadn't done anything too far out there. After we had done plenty of play, I had found myself always yearning to be the submissive one ... I can't really explain it, but I loved it.

A couple of weeks ago I mentioned the idea to her of a 24/7 style of BDSM relationship, where I would become her property - a full time slave, for everything sexual and non-sexual. She seemed intrigued by it and we started to look more into it. We found some great resources on the Internet, and before you know it we had our first Mistress/Slave contract drawn up. I'll talk about the contract itself in another post though as it was a fairly detailed piece of work.

So that brings you pretty much up to date with the starting point here, I am the slave, and my Mistress owns me. I'm here only to serve her, and I love doing so, I really do. I want to become a 'perfect' little slave (if there is such a thing) and I want my Mistress to mould me into that. So we'll see how this all goes, I'll document it all here for you to read, and I'll also have some pictures here too eventually. That's about it for now I guess, stay tuned for more in the near future.